Waking up in Amsterdam!

Your raconteur has JUST survived his very first (attempted) assault in Amsterdam…

The authorities were notified, but since I made the the bad guys literally run away crying (by breaking BOTH of their noses!) they weren’t quite so terribly interested…

I was once a cop, I certainly understand! (I was even congratulated for keeping my gear!)

Remember, Campers, if a bad guy wants YOUR stuff, hitting them in the nose with the heel of your hand (repeatedly, if necessary!) will cool their jets pretty FUCKING fast!

They were completely SHOCKED (the bad guys AND the cops) that I could mount such an effective defense! [Surprise!]

They just picked the wrong guy to try to fuck with… (stupid motherfuckers!)

I’d just had the sweetest night covering one of my kittens parties…

Miss Brown was leaving DBJ after 8 years of spinning there and she asked me to shoot the proceedings! (They were SO very sweet to her!!!)

It’s something I’d do for any girl that lets me call her “kitten”!!!

I left the club at 0430 for a taxi on the muntplein and these 2 black guys tried to jump me for my gear…

Both of them will be thinking of me when they try to blow their noses for about six weeks… (dumb assholes!)

Your raconteur studiously avoids personal combat at most costs, but it’s admittedly good to know he’s still rather capable of effective violence when challenged… (Which will NEVER mean I’m actually proud of it!)

Want MY stuff?!?

Good Luck!